Sometimes we become very single-minded about our lives and fail to see the bigger picture that is around us. We start to accept the status quo and to stop questioning beliefs that no longer support us. Things become ‘normal’, boring and average.
Good news, as the way out of this, is to embrace the mentality of ‘both’.
A both mentality is where you have the thoughts that you can achieve more from your day and satisfy all of the things in your life without having to pick one task over another. It means doing everything on your to-do list, not just the important ones.
- Can I work out every day and spend time with my wife – both
- Can I work on this important work project and spend time relaxing – both
- Can I be rich and down to earth – both
- Can I be confident and humble – both
- Can I build flat pack furniture for my wife and work on a big project (true story) – both
These things are not an either or, they are things which can all be embraced if you have the right mindset. You have the time to do these things if you have a both mentality. Without it, your brain will treat one task as more important than another so you will only get one thing done, when you could have done everything.
The story we often hear is that you can’t be rich and spiritual. Like they are two sides of a coin that cannot be achieved together. That is hogwash, having money doesn’t make you less or more spiritual than someone who is poor. It just means you can meditate in better surroundings.
A both mentality applies to everything in your life, from your action items to your communication with people. For example, if you have had a disagreement with a customer, you might to give them a piece of your mind and forever lose them as a customer. A both mentality will open your mind up so you think of ways in which you can both win. It’s a better way of thinking about the situation so things can get resolved in a manner where both parties have been successful. That’s a bit different from losing that customer forever and them telling people about their bad service from you.
With a ‘both’ mentality you can have all of the choices on the table. It is having your cake, eating it and then going back to the cake stand and getting some more.
So what can you do today to have a ‘both’ mentality?
Do these 3 things to cultivate a both mentality, the key is to think about both things getting done or both people being happy.
- Think of a task that is outside of your normal comfort zone and schedule it for today. Just get it done and out of the way alongside your important tasks and see how you feel.
- Do something extra every day for the next week, all the while thinking about getting both things done.
- Call someone who you have been putting off and think about how you can make both them and yourself happy on the call.
That’s the both mentality, that’s how to be more fulfilled.